Oh boy!

HERE’S an interesting question: why is it okay for two women to dance together but not for two men?

I have noticed it at ballroom and salsa. A woman dancing with another raises no eyebrow. But two men dancing? That is cause for great merriment.I can attest to that personally because I tried it the other day at Enrique’s salsa-do — purely as a matter of research, you understand. Now I can confidently state a) it is the best way to be the centre of attention on the floor (other than falling flat on your face, that is), and b) my Norwegian friend Morten makes a fantastic woman.   

We made heads turn, of course. Everyone smirked, especially when we went into closed hold. We tried a few dips, and it went down well. This prompted me to do a few hip-grinds. Lady M, for his part, thought doing some girly ‘shines’ would be entertaining. It was, and the crowd had a look of amused appreciation.

Point is, two women dancing thus — doing even more slinky moves — would not have got such attention. Nor the, ah, charitable comments from my friends…

“I am seriously beginning to wonder about you!” said Girl 1. (Don’t — there are enough people around to say I swing straight and none to say otherwise… because I killed them all afterwards, you see.)

“What’s wrong with you?” said Girl 2.

“What a terrible waste!” said Girl 3.

“It’s bloody unfair. I was going to ask Morten for a dance!” said Girl 4. (Serves you right, girl, that’s your punishment for not asking me, hah!)

“You like it, don’t you?” said Girl 4.

See what I mean? This is true of the ballroom circuit as well. Quite common for women to dance together, even compete in medallist rounds. I am yet to see a boy-boy couple, though. Okay, I can understand the logic — too many women, too few men — and also there are separate events for gay couples, but, hey, why such smirky outrage at the thought of men dancing together? If a woman can get away with dancing as man, why not the other way round? Seriously, this is what I call sexual discrimination.

At the next comp I think I will ditch my lovely Zimbabwean partner Sarah and walk on to the floor with a man on my arm. I really want to see the look on the adjudicators’ faces.

Besides, I have a feeling Morten will look gorgeous in a ball gown.


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